Thursday, April 03, 2008

mayreni khozouei

m2, remember the 'i'm so glad' lists i'd leave on your facebook wall? i think they got me through the better part of a year. reminding myself of all the things banal and big that i was grateful for.

today, everyday lately, i feel this overwhelming surge of gratitude. it's not about the big stuff like health and the fact that i'm living in a country where i have so much freedom. well it is, but what really resonates is the small stuff. like yesterday, sitting in the sun my mum pointed out a lizard and talked about how beautiful it was as it scampers around the wall - it was just a little brown lizard, at first glance nothing special. but with excitement in her voice she talks about the patterns on its back, the way it moves so gracefully. she creates a story about it, gives it a purpose. for as long as i can remember my mum has always noticed the little things and finds so much beauty in them. she is completely enamored with this world that god has created. and it's infectious.

as i was waking up the other morning i heard all my relatives talking about my parent's farm and i listened as mum gave a blow-by-blow account of her mornings, letting out one dog, only to put another in a paddock. then feeding the chickens, the cats, the birds. observing the geese, the fish, the cows. i think of her as a female version of dr. doolittle. she loves animals, nature, people. she has always had a keen sense of the interconnectedness of the world. it pains her if someone else is unhappy. total stranger or closest friend, it doesn't make a difference. she is a born nurturer.

and i think about how growing up i always wanted the 'beverly hills 90201' mother. i wanted the one who would take me and my friends to get pedicures, and be as excited about the latest fashions as i was. the one who would talk to me about boys, spend hours on her hair and make up to look as young and trendy as possible. you know, the 'cool' mum.

but now, i'm so grateful for the gifts she gave me. for the complete acceptance and love she showered on all of my friends. i never felt for one minute that i didn't meet or exceed her expectations. she gave advice but without burdening me. she allowed me to figure it all out for myself and not once have i heard her say 'i told you so'. she loves indiscriminately and that, above everything, was a beautiful virtue to observe.

i love that i can walk downstairs today and hug my mum.

go hug yours.
x

4 comments:

Ghetto Blaster said...

our moms, excuse me, "mums" should meet ;)

amy said...

oh i wish i could! she is so far away right now :(

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capone said...

hug her for me please.............................